Dave Kiffer is a freelance
writer living in Ketchikan, Alaska.
A freelance writer
is an uncommitted independent writer who produces and sells articles
to a publisher such as SitNews.
Contact Dave at
dave@sitnews.us
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Ketchikan Weather Visiting Anchorage
This Summer - Here's
a headline sure to elicit sympathy from all Ketchikanders:- More...
Monday - August 16, 2010
Remembering
Uncle Ted - I will always remember Ted Stevens asking me
to show him my "new toys." - More...
Thursday - August 12, 2010
Unplugged!
- The most horrendous thing happened to me other night. - More...
Friday - July 30, 2010
FALLING
FOR PUBLIC ART - I've been taking it easy, the last couple
of weeks.
I know, I know, how can anyone
really tell when I take it easy? - More...
Wednesday - July 21, 2010
I
Oughta Be In Pictures - Well, actually, I am. Dozens of times
a day.
You see, I work Downtown and
as I go about my daily routine my picture is snapped over and
over and over again. - More....
Wednesday - June 30, 2010
What's
Up With the Droning and Driving? - I saw something pretty
amazing the other day.
A guy was driving backwards
on Tongass Avenue. - More...
Thursday - June 24, 2010
For
Whom The Grass Grows: Not Thee!" - Ah spring, when everyone's
hopes are eternal and every team still has a chance.- More...
Wednesday - May 26, 2010
You
Call Them Mechanicals, I Call Them Naps. - My enthusiastic
fans - both of them - are concerned that I have been pretty easy
on Alaska Airlines this winter. - More...
Tuesday - May 11, 2010
Ends
and Odds. - First the ends.
A friend from Outside emails
me the other day.
"So Alaska is now giving
money to dead people?" - More...
Tuesday - April 27, 2010
Thanks
for the Memories, Inga / Francine - One of the great things
about moving to Ketchikan - or anywhere else in Alaska for that
matter - is the fact that you can reinvent yourself if you really
want. - More...
Saturday - April 10, 2010
Planning
For The Next Big Thing - With all of our eyes shifted north
to see who crosses the Iditarod finish line first (I bet it will
be a dog), it's time to harness up the old entrepreneurial spirit
sled and come up with some ideas for other funtastic events to
boost our great state. - More..
Tuesday - March 16, 2010
You
Got A "No Problem" With That? - I have a problem.
Well, it's not really a problem. It's just that I say "no
problem" a lot. That's not really a problem. Unless of course
you are one of those folks whose has a problem with how often
I say "no problem." - More....
Monday - March 08, 2010
Char
and Dave's Excellent Adventure, Parte Tres - Tere comes a
time in every trip where you must "use the facilities."
- More...
Friday - January 08, 2010
Char
and Dave's Excellent Adventure, Parte Dos By DAVE KIFFER
- Don Quixote would have gone completely stark, screaming bonkers.
- More...
Monday - December 07, 2009
Char
and Dave's Excellent Adventure, Parte Uno - What we
had was a failure to communicate. - More...
Monday PM - November 16, 2009
Live,
From The Egosphere! - I have been on Facebook for a few weeks
now. - More...
Monday PM - November 09, 2009
Ex
Gov Sideswiped By 'Rogue' Rage -
More...
Monday - October 19, 2009
Wacky
Visitors, Circa 2009 - Now that the last cruise ship has
headed for the Panama Canal, it's time to answer the biggest
question of the season. More...
Wednesday - October 07, 2009
Only
in Ketchikan - So, I was thumbing through the newspaper the
other day and I came across an odd little classified ad. - More...
Tuesday - September 29, 2009
A
Walk Down Memory Lane - I took a walk along First Avenue
the other day and I noticed something was missing. - More...
Monday - September 21, 2009
There's
Always a Chance - Thank God, that aberrant summer weather
has finally left our bioclime. - More...
Thursday - September 10, 2009
We're
Off On The Road To Alaska's Capital! - No, not Juneau, but
the capital in waiting, Willow.- More...
Monday - August 31, 2009
Read
All About It! - When I was in journalism school quite a few
years ago, I learned that nearly half of the readers of any daily
paper simply scanned the headlines and never read the actual
stories. - More....
Thursday - August 13, 2009
TOO
DARN HOT, AGAIN! - It stands to reason that as you read this
column it will probably be cold and raining.- More...
Friday - July 31, 2009
Ketchikan
Didn't Need to Be 30 Miles Long, Four Blocks Wide - I
have the greatest respect for the founders of Ketchikan. - More...
Monday - July 20, 2009
A
Young Man For All Seasons - For the past two weeks, I have
been walking around as though I have been hit in the stomach
with a baseball bat. - More...
Monday - July 06, 2009
Got
Keys? That Depends. - One of the neat-o advantages of turning
50 - other than the 50 percent off coupons for incontinence products
- is the fact that I finally have an excuse for misplacing things.
- More...
Monday - June 22, 2009
An
Idea Whose Time Has Come - Press Release from the Office
of the President of the United States of America: April 1, 2017
President Sarah Palin announced
this morning a plan to locate America's newest maximum security
"terrorist/enemy non-combantant" permanent holding
facility in Ketchikan. - More...
Monday - June 08, 2009
When
the Going Gets Tough, The Tough Get Weird - Okay, I'll admit
it. I'm a sucker for what are often called "offbeat"
or "weird" stories. I can't pass up a website that
offers those sort of "man bites dog" or "politician
NOT in jail" stories. - More...
Wednesday - May 13, 2009
TSA
Worries Have Gone (Snow) Global - Somewhere, as I write this,
a terrorist is planning to hijack a jet with a snow globe. -
More...
Monday - May 04, 2009
Some
Clouded Thinking On The Weather - I was driving an out of
town guest along the Third Avenue Bypass recently and he made
an interesting observation. - More...
Wednesday - April 22, 2009
Breaking
Up' Is Hard To Do - I can hardly wait for the first day of
Spring!
What, you say, Spring officially
sprung on March 20? - More...
Wednesday - April 01, 2009
Smoke
Gets In My Eyes - I saw something unusual the other day.
- More...
Thursday - March 26, 2009
Don't
Worry, Be Happy, Sort of - Okay, so there is still
slushy white stuff on the ground and it is mid March. - More...
Thursday - March 09, 2009
What
Happens in Coach - It all started with a Digeplayer. - More...
Monday - March 09, 2009
Fly,
Fly, Fly Again - From the "If At First You Don't
Succeed" Department: It was a stunningly beautiful morning
in Juneau.
The snow had stopped- More...
Wednesday - March 04, 2009
Winter
Travel As Easy As (No) Pie - In the winter, you "takes
your chances" when it comes to travel in Southeast Alaska.-
More...
Monday - February 09, 2009
Farewell
To Some Old Friends - It's one of those truisms in
the journalism biz that obituaries spike right after the holidays.
- More...
Thursday - January 22, 2009
Visits
by Santa Claus, the Easter Bunny, or the Tooth Fairy - Spoiler
Alert!: If you or anyone else in your family still believes that
Santa Claus, the Easter Bunny or the Tooth Fairy still visits
your house please don't read this. Or at least don't leave it
up on your home computer where someone else can read it! - More...
Monday - December 29, 2008
When
it Comes to Political Corruption, Alaskans Try Harder! -
Alaskans were feeling pretty smug recently when Illinois
leapt up and took away our position near the top of the political
corruption hit parade in the national media. - More...
Thursday - December 11, 2008
Thankful
We Survived Again - Well, we made it. - More...
Friday - December 05, 2008
Almost
Famous - Last summer, my son asked me an odd question. -
More...
Saturday - November 15, 2008
A
More 'Civil' Society - I recently had the pleasure of spending
several days with our Canadian Cousins in Prince Rupert. - More...
Monday PM - October 13, 2008
Characters
Wanted - I was surprised to read Tom Wetzel's obituary in
the Ketchikan Daily News recently. - More...
Monday - September 22, 2008
Down
the Political Rabbit Hole - Yes, Boys and Girls, that giant
wooshing sound you heard Friday morning was indeed the sound
of 650,000 Alaskans simultaneously spitting out their morning
coffee. - More...
Sunday - August 31, 2008
Is
Ketchikan Still High In "Spirits? - It was their first
visit back to K-Town since the early 1980s.
"Where are all the bars?"
They asked. - More...
Sunday - August 17, 2008
For
$100 Grand, It Better Be Sunny! - I'm sure that when
you read this it will be a gloriously sunny day in our fair salmon
city. - More...
Friday - August 01, 2008
One
Ringie-Dingie, Two Ringie-Dingies - Yes, I have finally purchased
my first cell phone. - More...
Tuesday - July 22, 2008
No
Food For You! - So what will $50 buy you these day? - More...
Saturday - June 28, 2008
Life,
Death and Road Maintenance - Summer is here in the Soggy
Southern Southeast. - More...
Friday - June 20, 2008
An
Idea That's All Wet! - It may come as a surprise, but we
have a lot of "farmers" here in Our Fair Salmon City!
- More...
Saturday - June 14, 2008
Your
Next American Idle! - Men and Women are different. - More...
Sunday - June 01, 2008
It's
The Water - For some reason, the coming of the summer always
reminds me of beer. - More...
Tueseday - May 27, 2008
Thursdays
With Mary - For the past decade, I have been teaching Ketchikaners
how to play music At any given time, I have about a dozen students
dutifully trying to get "joyful noises" out of the
saxophone, flute or clarinet. \Generally these students are youngsters,
anywhere from fourth grade through high school. Most take lessons
for a year or so and then fall off the radar, usually because
of the crush of other activities. - More...
Monday - May 19, 2008
Real
Answers to Real Questions - Spring is here!
Robins are chirping, skunk
cabbage is flowering and street maintenance is being deferred
once again. - More...
Tuesday PM - May 06, 2008
I'm
Henry VIII, I am, I am! - While the rest of you were enjoying
the beautiful - rare - sunny skies last week, I was pondering
my place in history. - More...
Sunday - April 27, 2008
Go
North!!! - So, I was minding my own business sitting in a
public convenience in a large western American airport - okay,
SEATAC - recently. - More...
Monday - April 14, 2008
What
ARE They Drinking In West Virginia? - Sometimes you
see a headline that makes you laugh. - More...
Tuesday - March 25, 2008
Hey
Youngster! - I can't remember how many times I heard that
call, usually while I was wandering aimlessly in the aisles at
one of our local supermarkets. - More...
Tuesday - March 04, 2008
Let's
Play: Name That Cruise Ship!!! - Royal Caribbean wants my
opinion! - More...
Thursday - February 21, 2008
Triangulate
This, NAVSTAR! - I was sitting behind a car at a stop light
the other day.
That in itself always seems
a little exotic, because - naturally - I can remember when Ketchikan
had no stop lights. - More...
Sunday PM - February 10, 2008
Salmon
Slickers - Last week I was trolling through the couple of
hundred "Ketchikan" related items on EBAY when something
caught my eye. - More...
Tuesday - January 29, 2008
Looking
for Sign - It was a couple of days before New Year's and
my son and I were standing on the rocks at Bugge Beach. - More...
Thursday - January 10, 2008
Just
Feeling A Little Testy - Since I am a baseball fan, I have
been thinking a lot about steroids and drug testing lately. -
More...
Wednesday - December 26, 2007
An
Unexpected Holiday 'Card' - I was minding my own business
in the checkout line at Wingrens- SeaMart- Carrs- Safeway the
other day, when the clerk threw me for a loop. - More...
Friday AM - December 21, 2007
Are
You Really Ready for An Alaska Man? - From time to time I
have noted that I'm still receiving numerous emails from Outsiders
- mostly of the female persuasion - wanting info about Alaska.
- More...
Thursday AM - December 13, 2007
It's
a Beautiful Day, In Frost Patch USA - By the time you read
this, Ketchikan's normal wet winter will probably have resumed.
- More...
Monday AM - December 10, 2007
Is
K-Town The Sweet Hairy-After? - Sometimes something just
leaps out and smacks you upside the head and really gets your
attention. - More...
Monday AM - December 03, 2007
But
It's a Dry Rain! - One of the most interesting weather related
phrases I have ever heard is "yes, but it is a dry heat."
- More...
Monday AM - November 19, 2007
It's
A Wet World, After All! - Okay, this may not look much like
work, but I'm on the clock here on this sandy beach in paradise,
let me tell you! -
More....
Monday AM - November 12, 2007
Just
A Little Craik In The Manger, Officer! - Recently, I attended
one of those grand Ketchikan soiree's in which the food and beverages
flowed quite freely. - More...
Tuesday AM - October 30, 2007
Will
Juneau Finally Learn How To Guzzle? - I have always thought
our neighbors in Juneau are a little different from you and me.
- More...
Wednesday - October 24, 2007
This
Column Must Be Consumed by 12/06/09 - As I sit at my computer
terminal, I notice that my bottled water (no "heliocentric"
acid rain water from KPU for this boy!) has a "sell by"
date. - More...
Sunday - October 07, 2007
Alaska
in the Spotlight - Alaska has been in the national media
lately and - for a change - it was nothing about a Bridge to
Nowhere/Somewhere/Anywhere. - More...
Monday AM - September 10, 2007
Tailgating
Idaho - The following factoid should come as a shock to anyone
who drives in Alaska.
Especially someone like me
who has been "bumped" by "distracted" (cell
phones!) drivers twice in the past month (nothing serious, thank
goodness for big cushy, gas guzzling SUV bumpers). - More...
Wednesday - August 29, 2007
It's
That Time Again - A few days ago, I was walking downtown
and I saw a group of visitors irritably huddled under an awning.
- More...
Wednesday PM - August 22, 2007
Wonders
Will Never Cease- There has been much media hoopla lately
over a new internet poll determining the New Seven Wonders of
the World. - More...
Saturday - July 21, 2007
Still
Hazy After All These Years - The Ketchikan High School class
of 1977 turned 30 a couple of weeks ago. - More...
Monday PM - July 16, 2007
A
Drip Off the Old Block - My good friends in Lost Angeles
are a little parched.
It seems they have just suffered
through the driest weather "year" since records started
being kept 130 years ago. As of June 30 (weather years are July
1 to June 30 in LA, go figure) a total of 3.21 inches of rain
had fallen in the City of "Angles." - More...
Monday - July 09, 2007
Beware:
Dangerous Curves Ahead! - Marriage is an interesting
institution.
And I mean that in the Chinese
way of "cursing" someone by saying "may you live
in interesting times." - More...
Tuesday AM - June 26, 2007
An
Airline Upgrade You Don't Want - Tired of sitting in a cramped
economy class on a long plane flight? - More...
Saturday - June 09, 2007
Lose
Weight Instantly: Become Canadian - Lately, I've been getting
a lot of email about something called "Hoodia." - More...
Sunday - June 03, 2007
RIP:
Golden Nugget Service - Our national airline, Alaska, is
choosing this month - May - to make us jump through some big
wild hoopla over its 75th anniversary. Alaska celebrating its
history all the way back to Mac McGee and his three-seat Stinsons
in 1932. - More...
Saturday AM - May 19, 2007
Remembering
the 'Thunderer' - It was good to see people all across
the political spectrum turn out for Jim Elkin's memorial service
recently. - More...
Saturday - May 12, 2007
April IS the Cruelest Month! - I'm pretty sure that T.S. Eliot
was not thinking of my adolescence when he penned "The Waste
Land" but he wasn't far off. - More...
Friday - April 27, 2007
Beware
the 'Curse' of the State Quarters - Alaskans have until April
22 to weigh in on which design they think is best for the Alaska
state commemorative quarter that the US Mint will produce a year
from this fall. - More...
Monday - April 16, 2007
Ketchikan:
Unplugged - It was a sad scene at one of Ketchikan's more
popular eateries one morning recently. - More...
Wednesday AM - April 11, 2007
I
Grocery Shop Therefore I Am - You can date a local by how
they refer to Ketchikan grocery stores. - More...
Wednesday - March 28, 2007
One
Way To End Channel Surfing - A couple of recent news items
caught my eye.
First, La-Z-Boy is facing a
"difficult sales environment" and is slashing jobs
and closing several manufacturing plants in order to cut losses
estimated at some $10 million last year. - More...
Monday AM - March 19, 2007
The
Next Billy Graham - ike most six year olds, Liam appreciates
a bit of a schedule.
Oh, he complains a bit when
we cut off his morning cartoon in order to pile him into the
car for school, but he appreciates the fact that there is a morning
routine. - More...
Friday AM - March 09, 2007
Captive
Audience: 'Bin' There, Done That - Years ago, there was a
bar in downtown Ketchikan that had beer advertisements plastered
on the walls above the urinals. - More...
Wednesday AM - February 21, 2007
Our
Cajun Sister State - I read recently that the most popular
baby names in Alaska are "Madison" for girls and "Ethan"
for boys. - More...
Monday PM - February 12, 2007
Men
in Sage Brush - If you Google "Men in Trees" you
come up with my name.
I know this because quite a
few folks in other locales have done just that and then reached
out and electronically touched me. - More...
Saturday AM - February 03, 2007
Alaska's
Third Largest City!?! - Back when I was a young lad in the
late 1960s and early 1970s, a momentous event happened in the
First City.
There was a rare stagnant period
in what is normally exponential state government growth. When
you combined that with a boom in the timber industry, Ketchikan
briefly outstripped Juneau as the third largest "city"
in Alaska. - More...
Monday AM - January 29, 2007
Totems
- In the last few years, we've all watched our Downtown turn
into something different than we all remember. Part of that is
just the one constant in all our lives: Change. - More...
Tuesday - January 23, 2007
Dousing
a Dangerous Development - The petty dictators of airplane
discipline gave travelers an early Christmas present recently
by allowing us to take water on plane flights again. - More...
Tuesday - January 09, 2007
2006
Year In Review: Jet Crash Top Story In 2006 - Some newsworthy
events happen every year. Elections, crime, storms, and other
relatively normal events can be expected to make local headlines.
But the most newsworthy event
in 2006 in Ketchikan was completely unexpected: the crash of
a military jet into a trailer park near Carlanna Creek in January.
- More...
Tuesday - January 02, 2007
Statistically
Speaking - I love statistics.
When I was a little kid, I
memorized reams and reams and reams of sports "stats".
- More...
Friday AM - December 15, 2006
Still
'Fishy' After All These Years - Recently, I wrote about Seattle
coming up with a new "brand," calling itself the "Metro
Natural" place. - More...
Saturday - December 09, 2006
Lessons
Learned - We learn the most from our parents. We learn second
most from our school teachers.
But often there are other people
in our community who teach us things that are very important.
- More...
Saturday - December 02, 2006
The
Big Recliner In The Sky - A gentleman in Pacheco, California
had a lot to be thankful for last week.
It seems his wife shot him
with a .357 Magnum. But he was saved. By his recliner. - More...
Friday PM - November 24, 2006
Dreaming
of a Wet Christmas - I've been asked by three different people
what it means to have significant snow before Thanksgiving. -
More...
Monday AM - November 20, 2006
Flying
the 'Fiendly' Skies - Alaska Airlines is celebrating its
75th birthday next year by printing heartwarming stories from
passengers on its website. - More...
Thursday AM - November 09, 2006
Seattle's
'Branding' is A Great Big Ouch! - I see in the news
that our good friends in Seattle are once again concerned about
how they market themselves to the outside world. The Seattle
Convention and Visitors Bureau has undertaken another "branding
" campaign and have spent 16 months and two hundred thousand
dollars to get a new "brand." - More...
Monday - October 30, 2006
Commuter
has the Midas Touch - A few days ago, I was driving into
town from Settler's Cove. It was rainy and there were "puddles"
in the low lying areas of the North Tongass Highway, so I was
cheerfully hydroplaning around the corners at 50 mph. - More...
Tuesday PM - October 24, 2006
Pass,
Shoot, Score! - Liam's final micro-soccer game was last week.
That means that I am no longer a "soccer mom." At least
until next fall. - More...
Monday AM - October 16, 2006
Hear
That Lonesome Whistle - Several years ago I was working at
KRBD and I got a pretty funny phone call from one of the federal
agencies that deal with transportation safety. I can't remember
which acronym it used. - More...
Wednesday - October 04, 2006
Men
In Trees" - Ketchikan's own A.J. Slagle got a "shout
out" last week on national television.
Slagle was mentioned in an
episode of a new television series that is "set" in
Alaska called "Men in Trees." The premise of the show
is that a "relationship" expert sees her relationship
implode and she ends up in Alaska, where the sexual ratio is
so out of whack that there are "men in trees." - More...
Monday PM - September 25, 2006
We're
No. 26!!! - It's fall and that means that the sap gets cut
off from the branches and more surveys and studies drop down
to clog up my driveway. - More...
Monday - September 18, 2006
Cowered
By Corvids - I can't go out on my deck anymore.
No, not because the fall weather
has arrived. We have a mostly covered deck and I can sit there
and watch the rain drip off the clogged gutters as well as the
next guy. - More...
Tuesday - September 12, 2006
It's
A Small World - Okay everyone, after me! - More...
Tuesday - September 05, 2006
Studies
Are Hazardous To My Health - I read last week that being
just a "little obese" can be hazardous to your health.
- More...
Monday - August 28, 2006
This
Will Only Take A Minute! - We all like to be thought of as
important.
That's why it is so hard to
turn down a chance to be "surveyed". - More...
Monday PM - August 21, 2006
O
Where, O Where is Delaware? - Several folks have asked how
my annual License Plate Bingo battle is going, so time for an
update as we head into the dog days of August. - More...
Sunday - August 13, 2006
The
Best Wage of All - This is my 100th column for SITNEWS.
- More...
Monday AM - August 7, 2006
Wild
Kingdom: Ketchikan Style - There was a wee bit of a traffic
jam on the Third Avenue bypass a week ago. - More...
Friday - July 28, 2006
Slumming
With The Locals - Garrison Keillor was in town this week
and that qualifies as a celebrity sighting. - More...
Sunday - July 23, 2006
Digging
the dirt on Revilla Man - A zillion years ago I was sitting
in a college literature class and the teacher said a strange
thing. - More...
Monday - July 17, 2006
Red
Neck leaves me feeling Blue - Ouch.
Okay, let's try again.
Ouch.
Sorry, it's not so easy to
type when your neck and arms are the color and consistency of
a boiled lobster. - More....
Monday - July 10, 2006
Driving
Is Going To The Dogs - My wife maintains a somewhat amused
eye toward local "traditions" despite the fact she
has now lived here 15 years. - More...
Monday - July 03, 2006
Forsooth!
- We live in a small town, sometimes - amid all the summer hustle-bustle
and thousands of visitors milling around in the middle of the
street - I forget that. - More...
Sunday - June 25, 2006
Ketchikanites,
Ketchikanians, Rainbirds, Wet Heads? - A while back I was
at a gathering and someone stood up and addressed the group as
"my fellow Ketchikanites." - More...
Saturday - June 17, 2006
Should
Ketchikan Warm to GLOBAL WARMING? - Our good friends in Juneau
are concerned with GLOBAL WARMING.
I have to use all capital letters
when discussing GLOBAL WARMING because proper protocol demands
that "good stewards of the Earth" always use all caps
(the written word version of shouting) for GLOBAL WARMING because
it is such an important issue. - More...
Sunday - June 11, 2006
Who
IS Cinco de Mayo? - I was skulking about downtown the other
day when I noticed two Amish couples walking down the sidewalk.
They were most definitely "plainly dressed" and the
men had remarkable facial hair. - More...
Thursday - June 01, 2006
Giving
Our Fellow Lawbreakers A Break - Once again, a tip of the
ten gallon hat to our "fellow Amaricuns" in the Great
State of Texas. - More...
Sunday - May 28, 2006
From
Google Eyes to Googling - One of the advantages of living
in a small town is that you pretty much know what you're getting
when you get "involved" with someone new. After all,
many folks have lived here for a while and everyone has a really
long memory. - More...
Friday - May 19, 2006
Warning:
This Warning May Make You Crazy - I was at my favorite office
supply purveyor last week, when I noticed something odd on the
pens I was buying. They came with a disclaimer which read in
part "please remove cap before use. Failure to remove cap
will prevent proper operation." - More...
Friday - May 12, 2006
Bigger
and Better, New and Improved! - When I was at Kayhi (during
the Ford and Carter administrations!), one of my favorite TV
shows was the original "Saturday Night Live" with Ackroyd-Belushi-Radner
et al. It was "must see" every week TV for myself and
my semi-delinquent posse. - More...
Monday -May 01, 2006
Take
Off My Studs? Snow Way! - I suspect that about 80 percent
of Ketchikan drivers broke the law last week. - More...
Friday - April 21, 2006
Spring
has sprung, rat-a-tat-tat! - Everyone seems to have
a different way of determining when spring has arrived in Ketchikan.
- More...
Monday - April 17, 2006
Suddenly
Over the Hill - I had a weird experience in the aisles
of Safeway recently. - More...
Sunday - April 09, 2006
A
'Token' for Your Thoughts! - When my older brothers
vacated the old family homestead on First and Jefferson, they
left a lot of fun stuff in the attic for me to discover. - More...
Monday - April 03, 2006
For
Once, Four Wheeled Was Fore Armed - Last week was the one
week out of the year where I could feel an "eensy-weensy-teensy"
bit smug about owning an urban assault vehicle. - More...
Saturday - March 25, 2006
Shopping
for Unmanly stuff - The other day I was in the checkout line
at A and P and I found myself explaining to the checkout clerk
why I had all these little kiddie toys and games in my basket.
- More...
Friday - March 17, 2006
Some
Local History To Chew On - I was walking along Water Street
recently when I noticed The Pizza Mill had closed down. - More...
Saturday - March 11, 2006
Citius,
Altius, Fortius, Ketchikanius! - Well, the Winter Olympics
are finally over. - More...
Thursday - March 02, 2006
Of
Flat Roofs and Pointed Heads - Earlier this year, I was mesmerized
by the reflection of water as my flight home sailed over the
First City. - More...
Monday - February 27, 2006
Just
a touch of gas - It's safe to say now that the bottom end
for gas prices in town is now around $2.70 - More...
Friday PM - February 17, 2006
The
Day I Came To Ketchikan - was really impressed when
my SITNEWS colleague June Allen wrote about her first day in
Ketchikan, all those years ago. - More...
Monday PM - February 13, 2006
Talk
of the Town - The jet crash near A&P recently remains
the big topic of discussion in Ketchikan. - More...
Monday - February 06, 2006
Blue
Monday - As usual, I was feeling a little depressed on Monday.
The weather was dark and icky, the holiday season was passed,
our trip to sunny California was over. - More...
Friday AM - January 27, 2006
And
the Drip Goes On - Anyone else out there "relieved"
that it finally sunned on Seattle earlier this week? - More...
Friday AM - January 20, 2006
Honey,
we shrunk the state! - My fellow Alaskans, our great state
in shrinking! - More...
Saturday - January 14, 2006
Quibbles
and Bits - At least once a year, all columnists are required
to clean out the sock drawer and dump all those scraps of paper
and bits of ideas they have been hoarding into a column. - More...
Friday - January 06, 2006
Vox
Populi #7 - A lot of readers had thoughts on my column
on whining about aging. - More...
Friday AM - December 30, 2005
Faux
Tanenbaum, Part Two - Those of you playing along at home
no doubt remember that the Glover-Kiffer family chose to go non-natural
for our holiday tree last year. - More...
Friday PM - December 23, 2005
A
Fine, Old Whine - I've been thinking about wine and cheese
lately.
Probably because they are the
few things that everyone agrees get better with age. And as one
ages one begins to appreciate such subtle distinctions because
we don't live in a society that gives a lot of "props"
for aging. - More...
Sunday AM - December 18, 2005
Keep
on (big) Truckin - My wife and I have both have a problem
with big trucks, but for different reasons. - More...
Saturday PM - December 10, 2005
Still
Drizzly After All These Years - This column is about what
didn't happen Monday, November 28, 2005
There was no measurable precipitation.
It was the first day since October 19 that there was no precipitation.
- More...
Friday - December 02, 2005
Tanzanite
Basin - It's going to be a long winter and no I'm not referring
to the darkness, the icky weather or even the dozens of local
folks chewing off their arms to extricate themselves from domestic
entanglements. - More...
Monday - November 28, 2005
And
Not A Drop To Drink - Stop the presses! The hydrologists
and meteorogists and fearmongerologists say the western United
States is running out of water. - More...
Monday - November 21, 2005
Splat
- My four year old asked me an unanswerable question last week.
- More...
Sunday - November 13, 2005
Truth
in Advertising - There was an old magazine advertisement
for sale on EBAY this week (told you they sold just about anything!).
- More...
Saturday - November 05, 2005
Termination
Dust - In early July, I found a wooley bear caterpillar
the size of my thumb crawling across the sand at Bugge Beach.
- More...
Monday - October 31, 2005
Vox
Populi #6 - Recently, a reader emailed in to find out what
"Vox Populi" really means. It's Latin (I feel sort
of comfortable saying that, even though none of the original
Latin speakers are alive to confirm that diagnosis). And it generally
means "voice of the people" or "the people speak"
although I firmly expect to hear from some dead language expert
who will correct that assumption. - More...
Monday - October 24, 2005
"It's
a Jungle Out There" - When I was a child, my mother
insisted that I take as many trips off island as possible. And
she didn't mean Gravina and Pennock. - More...
Monday - October 17, 2005
Tie-breakers
- Well, the local elections are all over but the shouting.
Some of my friends won, some
of my friends lost. So it goes.
One of the races appears to
have been decided by six or seven votes. Two years ago, one of
races was decided by five. We all think that our votes don't
count but that's not the case. A few years back, the Alaska governor's
race was decided by about a hundred votes and we all know what
happened in Florida in 2000. - More...
Friday - October 07, 2005
"Totem
Land Tinsel Town" - A few weeks ago, there was
an interesting item on EBAY. It was a 16 mm movie reel, the type
of movie reel you only used to see in movie theaters and high
school science classes. - More...
Monday - October 03, 2005
Being
in the "right" mind has nothing to do with it
- When you drive by the student parking lot at Kayhi these
days, you won't see many motorcycles. - More...
Thursday - September 29, 2005
"Close
Encounters of the Cellular Kind" - Since my family is
apparently the only one in North America to not go "cellular"
that puts us in a unique position to observe the ways that other
folks use their cell phones "conveniently" intrude
upon our lives. - More...
Friday - September 16, 2005
"Sometimes
nothing is really something" - Forty years ago today,
I had a life changing experience. Too bad I can't remember much
of it. - More...
Friday - September 09, 2005
"School
Daze, Part One" - School has started again in Our Fair
Salmon City and that has me remembering my school days. Surprisingly
enough, I was paying attention all those years ago, sort of.
- More...
Saturday - September 03, 2005
VOX
POPULI #5 - An alert reader dropped an email to let me know
that the old
Ketchikan PBY is back on EBAY again. The deadline for bids
is Monday. This time the opening bid has been lowered to $100,000
and there have been at least two bids tendered thus far. No clue
what the "reserve" price is but you can bet it's well
below the $250,000 price that drew no takers at least twice this
summer. The estimate on getting it airworthy (in the pictures
it's missing its horizontal stabilizer!) remains at $16,000.
As before, bid early, bid often. - More...
Friday - August 26, 2005
"A
Modest Proposal" - I think it's time that we should
stop whupping Governor Murkowski upside the head for his desire
for an official state jet plane. - More...
Monday - August 22, 2005
"Too
Darn Hot" - It was inevitable.
I was walking down Dock Street
one afternoon this week and I passed a good friend.
"This weather is killing
me," She said, raising her hand as if to wipe her brow.
- More...
Friday - August 12, 2005
One
of the "Big Three" By Dave Kiffer - Like many Alaskans
I have a Jay Hammond story to tell.
Hammond - who died last week
at 82 - was one of the "big three" Alaskan governors.
I don't necessarily mean that he, Bill Egan and Wally Hickel
were the best Alaskan governors, just that they dominated Alaskan
politics even when they weren't in sitting in the governor's
office. They cast bigger shadows. And Hammond - with his rugged
Alaskan Central Casting outdoorsman image - clearly cast the
biggest. - More...
Monday - August 08, 2005
"Halibut
Be Thy Name" - I've always been amused by parents who
tell me their toddlers are religious.
Sure, First Communions are
very important in some families as are declarations of faith
(such as being "born again.") But those are for older
children, not three and four year olds, no matter what their
parents might think. For the average four-year-old, "Sleeping
Beauty " or "Power Rangers" is about as close
to deity worship as they come. - More...
Friday - July 29, 2005
Times
change. I was reminded of that this week when a gentlemen
off a cruise ship gave me a copy of The Alaska Sportsman from
1942. The copy had belonged to his father who had always wanted
to visit Alaska but never had. The son - well past retirement
age himself - was clearly fulfilling his father's wish. - More...
Sunday - July 24, 2005
Pent
up demand - One of the first rules in marketing is
to find the pent up demand and then supply it.
Over time, it would be harder
to find a place with more pent up demand than Ketchikan. As an
example, just about every time a new retail or dining opportunity
arises, it is swamped by local interest. - More...
Monday - July 18, 2005
"Lies"
we tell ourselves - On the Friday before the Fourth of July,
an acquaintance remarked "It doesn't look good for the 4th."
-
More...
Friday - July 08, 2005
Pyro-leeryia
- My wife and I have a running disagreement when it comes to
candles. She - of solid New Mexican stock - loves to have burning
objects scattered hither and yon around the house. New Mexicans
love their candles so much that they even string lighted grocery
bags around their property at Christmas timeand, no, the bags
are not Gore Tex. What do you expect from a place that measures
rainfall in millimeters rather than cubic meters? - More...
Sunday - July 03, 2005
Vox
Populi #4 - For those of you all playing along at home, the
PBY on EBAY ("Going Once..") didn't get a high enough
bid to meet its unkstated reserve, but I received a lot of feedback
on that column. If we all chip in a buck we might be able to
get it after all. Some internet research indicates that there
are quite a few old PBYs sitting in Moses Lake after all. It
seems that someone was trying to corner the world market in the
old amphibians. Go figure. - More...
Friday - June 24, 2005
"Things
We Tell The Tourists" - A couple of weeks ago, I made
light of the "unanswerable" questions that the visitors
often toss at us.
For the record, I have been reminded that the Redington family
(of Iditarod fame) did have a store here briefly and they had
a couple of huskies on the premises so the question about where
all the "cute little Iditarods" were wasn't totally
off-base. - More...
Thursday - June 16, 2005
"Going
once, going twice......" File this under "if money
were no object."
I spend way too much time on internet auction sites, trolling
about for cool stuff. And stuff relating to Ketchikan's history
is always the coolest. - More...
Friday - June 10, 2005
The
beginning - It was a rare sunny summer day in June of 1970
and I was with my father on his trolling boat, the "Gony."
We were headed down to the New England Fish Company dock to get
ice for a trip to chase salmon on the back side of Gravina. -
More...
Sunday - June 05, 2005
Unanswerable
questions - Just 10 days into the summer visitor season I
received my first "unanswerable" question. - More...
Thursday - May 26, 2005
"Progress"
Progress is the root of all evil, progress is the cause
of it all! - Lil Abner, The Musical. - Without progress Ketchikan
would look something like Loring. Not that that would necessarily
be a bad thing - depending on whom you talk to - but it would
certainly be a different thing. - More...
Saturday - May 21, 2005
Hits
and Misses" - Now that my son Liam is 4 1/2 , he is
starting to show interest in sports. He gets excited when we
drive by the ball park and he sees the big kids playing baseball.
He gets really excited when we see one team that has red uniforms.
I suspect he thinks they are cool because they dress like Spider
Man. - More...
Saturday - May 14, 2005
"Star
Bowling at the Billiken" - Hall of Fame bowler Dick
Weber died earlier this Spring and that got me thinking about
my "misspent" youth at the old Billiken Bowl on Stedman
Street. - More...
Saturday - May 07, 2005
Not-so-young
man's fancy - It's spring, the sun is high in the sky and
a not-so-young man's fancy turns to baseball.....cards! - More...
Sunday - May 01, 2005
"Our
Lifestyle, Your Reward" - I jumped the gun in my last
column ("Hearty Alaskan Haven") and confused two different
parts of the visitor industry "branding" plan. - More...
Saturday - April 23, 2005
Hearty
Alaska Haven - Six months ago, I wrote a column noting that
local tourism officials were looking to improve the marketing
of Ketchikan by coming up with a "brand"that could
be used to distinguish Ketchikan from its competitors for the
visitor dollar. - More...
Monday - April 18, 2005
Jury
of Peers - Every so often a tiny bit of sanity floats up
from the morass that is our insane world.
This week a jury in Massachusetts
declined to blame an airline when a passenger claimed a bumpy
flight caused "post traumatic stress disorder." - More...
Sunday - April 10, 2005
Vox
Populi #3 - For those of you playing along at home, I did
misspell the word "crucifixion" in a recent column
("Talk About Multitasking"). Three alert (be alert,
the world needs more lerts!) readers brought it to my attention.
I could claim that the misspelling (crucifiction) was a Freudian
slip but even my subconscious isn't that smart. - More...
Saturday - April 02, 2005
"Onward
Christian Soldiers?" - I guess I must have missed another
memo.
I missed the memo that apparently
stated: Easter is an important holiday, for goodness sake! Buy
lots of stuff for other people. - More...
Sunday - March 27, 2005
"Talk
About Multitasking!" - Last week sitting in a Sea-Tac
departure lounge I came to a shocking conclusion.
I was waiting for a flight
to Oakland (yes, Gertrude, there is a "there" there)
and it dawned on me that I was only person (amongst a whole herd
of folks) that wasn't talking on a cell phone. - More...
Saturday - March 19, 2005
Nostalgia
like that... For my birthday, my darling wife Charlotte bought
me a video of the movie "Ray." - More...
Friday - March 11, 2005
Big
honking "egg" design - Judging by the "design"
competition just completed for the new Capitol building in Juneau.
I am absolutely, positively, 100 percent sure the following conversation
MUST have taken place earlier this week. - More...
Saturday - March 05, 2005
AKA CLUELESS, PART 3 - Thanks to the generosity of Sitnews
readers, the fun just never stops! Here are some more stories
of folks from Ketchikan's history who were both foolish and felonious!
- More...
Saturday - February 26, 2005
Good
Old Days - Once upon a time, I would have gone into serious
withdrawal if the National Hockey League season was cancelled
like just happened this week. - More...
Saturday - February 12, 2005
License
plate "bingo"- I saw a Rhode Island license plate
this week on Dock Street. - More...
Saturday - February 12, 2005
AKA
Clueless, Part 2 - I was pretty sure that last week's column
on clueless criminals in Ketchikan history would jog a few brain
cells and, sure enough, I received several emails and phone calls
suggesting other mentally muddled miscreants worthy of note.
- More...
Saturday - February 05, 2005
AKA
Clueless - Last week, I was reading one of those "stupid
criminal" stories (man tries to rob donut shop in Cleveland
and doesn't notice three uniformed police officers sitting at
one of the tables!) and it got me thinking about the stories
I've heard of local criminals who were a "few credits short
of a law degree." - More...
Saturday - January 29, 2005
Catalogs
- If your favorite slogan is "shop local" please avert
your eyes for a few minutes. - More...
Saturday - January 22, 2005
"Winter
sports? Snow way!" - I must finally be an "adult."
- More...
Saturday - January 15, 2005
Vox
Populi #2 - A lot of you were pretty amused when I misspelled
the word satellite a while back in a column about spelling. I
suppose I should it say it was an intentional mistake that was
placed there to make a point. But no, it was an unintentional
one. That definitely makes my point about the spelling bone suffering
from osteoporosis as one ages. - More...
Saturday - January 08, 2005
Happy
New Year - When I think about New Year's Eve in Ketchikan,
I think about Annette Funicello. - More...
Saturday - January 01, 2005
"And
To All, A Good Night." - The following story may or
may not be true. The names may or may not have been changed to
protect the ......
More...
Saturday - December 25, 2004
The
Christmas Wish List - When I was a child it would have been
easy to shop for me for Christmas. All my parents had to do was
order one of each toy in the Sears Wish Book. Well, every toy
except the Easy Bake Oven and Malibu Barbie, but you get the
idea. - More...
Saturday - December 18, 2004
O'
Faux Tannenbaum - We bought our first fake Christmas
tree this year. - More...
Saturday - December 11, 2004
Deck
Those Halls - Okay, it is after Thanksgiving, you may now
put up your Christmas lights! - More...
Satureday - December 04, 2004
DRIVEN
TO DISTRACTION - Ave (Hail) Automobius, God of Traffic and
Parking."
I often find myself muttering
that tribute whenever I safely pull into traffic. Usually it
means that some unseen hand has parted the Red Sea and allowed
me to finally enter the flow after a lengthy wait. In the old
days, drivers used to occasionally allow someone else to enter
the traffic stream but today we are in a such a big hurry that
such archaic manners have been left behind at the last light.
- More...
Saturday - November 27, 2004
Geographically
challenged! - I have always wondered how other Americans
can be so geographically and intellectually challenged when it
comes to Alaska. They don't seem to know much about it and what
they do know is - for the most part - wrong. When I was growing
up, I had several cousins down in Seattle and even they couldn't
grasp what Ketchikan was all about. - More...
Saturday - November 20, 2004
"The
Smell of Money" - My mom likes to talk about the "good
old days" when a dozen canneries clogged the Ketchikan waterfront
and the "Smell of Money" was in the air all summer
long. - More...
Saturday - November 13, 2004
"Spring
Ahead, Fall Down" - In all the hoopla over the Nov.
2 elections, I almost forgot to "Spring Ahead, Fall Back."
- More...
Saturday - November 06, 2004
Halloween
in Ketchikan... Now that's scary! - Halloween has always
been somewhat of a dicey proposition for Ketchikan. - More...
Saturday - October 30, 2004
It's
a guilt thing - Like many other locals I have been somewhat
amused (and a whole lot aghast) at the proliferation of jewelry
stores in Ketchikan's Combat Shopping Zone over the last few
years. We've always had a few local jewelry stores meeting the
needs of locals and visitors but is there any logical explanation
for 43 purveyors of fine gem stones to be located in downtown
Ketchikan each summer? - More...
Saturday - October 23, 2004
Vox
Populi - An astute reader recently called me on the carpet
for misspelling "nurture" not once but twice in a previous
column. My only defense is that I'm a graduate of the Ketchikan
school system and judging by the creative spelling in signage
around these parts poor spelling is not an uncommon affliction.
- More...
Monday - October 11, 2004
Hope
springs eternal - One of the great advantages to growing
up in Ketchikan is that you don't necessarily have to become
obsessed with the success or failure of a professional sports
team. - More...
Monday - October 11, 2004
The
More Things Change .. Just about once a decade, some enterprising
artist/entrepreneur gets the bright idea to sell advertising
space on a "map" of Ketchikan, usually of the downtown
area. Some are big and colorful like the one that fledgling artist
Ray Troll did in the early 1980s, some are tiny and in black
and white like ones that were done by local photographers in
the 1920s and 1930s. I collect these maps because they are fascinating
snap-shots of what the community was like in a given a year.
- More...
Tuesday -October 05, 2004
Ketchikan
Flashback - Last month my family and I spent a few days in
Wenatchee, Washington. It was hot (105 degrees), dry (maybe a
foot of rain a year) and everything Ketchikan is not. But it
did give me a great, big Ketchikan flashback. - More...
Tuesday - September 27, 2004
Bypass
Promenading - It's fun to see Ketchikan residents promenading
back and forth along the newly opened Third Avenue Bypass (AKA
5 Minutes Quicker to Liam's Daycare! ). Having fresh pavement
to pound always brings out the good cheer amongst our landlocked
bretheren. - More...
Tuesday - September 21, 2004
I
LUV that gun! - It is hunting season again but my 3-year
old son is not going to be heading out into the muskeg this year
to bring home the venison. At least I don't think so. - More...
Saturday - September 11, 2004
Branding
Ketchikan - The Ketchikan Visitors Bureau is conducting a
"branding" campaign in order to come up with a way
to better market Ketchikan to visitors. This process does sound
rather painful, but it does make sense because the visitor industry
has supplanted other industries as the engine of the local economy.
As much as we like to say Ketchikan is a "working"
community, the only real work we seem to be doing lately is for
the benefit of those who want to come here to see us "work."
- More...
Sunday - September 05, 2004
Copyright 2004 Dave
Kiffer
All Rights Reserved
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