DEAR CRABBY,

When it comes to our family, I do all the gift shopping. Recently, I picked out a nice present for my mother-in-law, from one of the better stores in town. My husband and I delivered it to her.

A few days later, she came by my place of work to say she didn't want it, that she had one already. Though stunned, I did suggest she might exchange the gift for something she'd like and then offered her the credit card slip (I no longer had the receipt). After a "Hmph.", she managed a "Well, maybe", and left, taking the gift along.

Crabby, this kind of treatment is typical of her. I've tried gift certificates in the past and was chided for my 'lack of imagination'. She's sickly nice around others, smiling and makes light of the insults.

I feel abused and hurt. Am I taking her too seriously?

DAUGHTER-IN-LAW

DEAR DIL,

Of course not. She doesn't like you, stupe. In this day and age, showing respect is good. Taking psychological (or any kind of) abuse is right up there with fatally running into a tree while videotaping the speedometer on your motorcycle just to prove you are really going 130 mph. This really happened. I would not make that up.

Next time, tell her your husband picked it out. Duuuh. And, as far as the way she treats you? It's better than a poke in the eye.

DEAR CRABBY,

My wife and I have recently bought our first home, and we love it. We both have good jobs, live in a great neighborhood, have a beautiful house, and are settling in nicely.

The problem is this one neighbor lady. "Vivian" calls up when my wife isn't home. She asks me if I'd help her out, or invites me over for a cup of coffee, etc. I've made excuses not to go over and made it clear that I am a happily married man, not looking for any "adventures", so she should visit when my wife returns. She makes me uncomfortable because she's good looking, and even though I'm not tempted, her constant commenting on my build sometimes gets me a little excited. I lift weights.

Crabby, should I tell my wife, and what do I do with Vivian?

HOT GUY TO VIVIAN

DEAR HGTV,

By all means tell your wife! How do you expect to persevere in your faithfulness if you keep this burden to yourself? Vivian will eventually wear you down, if you have no backup support. And did you invite her over to visit your wife? No, no! Tell her to leave you alone, or think about introducing her to someone else.

So... What are you wearing?

crabcakes@sitnews.org

 

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