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"Tan gate"
by Mark Neckameyer


September 30, 2004

Senator Kerry's new, orange face should be very, very important  to every voter.
We all saw the pictures on TV starting earlier this week. Suddenly Senator John Kerry has a very tan face.  Perhaps just writing "tan" is not completely accurate as his skin color has become more orange than tan,  He has obviously either enlisted the help of a not very good tanning salon or has used one of those chemical sprays or ointments that give you that unnatural color.  Some people have joked about the color coming as a result of so much campaigning in the "Rust Belt".  Others have attributed the change somehow to picking too many Halloween pumpkins.
John Kerry when asked about his suddenly radiant face explained that he had tanned because he had recently played touch football for an hour with some Harvard students.  The press talked to the Harvard boys and they said that the Senator's face was already orange when they first saw him.  The New England Autumn won't do that in an hour anyway.  His explanation was hogwash!  Just about he same thing occurred recently with the "Botox-gate" story.  Kerry's wrinkles magically disappeared but he denies doing anything to make them go. Sure!
Before anyone says,  "Everyone lies about sex and Botox.", please consider why this should matter to voters.  First,  here we have a clear instance of Senator Kerry lying to the press and to the rest of us.  It isn't important that John Kerry wants to fix himself up a bit with Botox and a tanning salon but for God's sake, either say nothing or don't lie.  If he lies about Botox what else would he lie about in office.  Second, not only does the Senator lie but he acts like we are all stupid.  He obviously does not respect the intelligence of the average American voter.  This is dangerous!
I don't know for certain if Senator Kerry fudged to get his medals in Viet Nam.  I have not personally counted his position flip flops and I haven't checked to see how many times he voted against arms and intelligence bills.  I don't even care that he married older wealthy women who bought him a European mansion while he rails against US companies going offshore or that he has an SUV while preaching against owning large cars.  I do believe that I caught him lying to me in a way about his smooth but orange face.  I feel like he clearly lied to me and any trust I had in him or respect I may have had for him is gone ... just like John Kerry's wrinkles.
Mark Neckameyer
Irvine, CA - USA



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