SitNews - Stories in the News - Ketchikan, Alaska


Academy Awards
By Mark Neckameyer


February 27, 2007
Tuesday PM

I hate these Academy Award Sundays in February! My wife who loves movies, reads People Magazine and all those rags at the check-out stand of the super market and really cares about "Brangolina", whoever that is, will force me under penalty of messy divorce to watch the twelve hour or so show while;

All the ultra rich stars who spend fortunes on tax experts to reduce their own taxes will use every excuse to rail against George W. Bush and all people above working class income levels for not raising taxes to increase welfare benefits and government employee pensions and it will make me mad!

These rich acting folks with their 20,000 Sq Ft mansions to be heated and cooled, private jets and yachts that each use more energy every year that the entire State Of Alaska, and Hummer SUVs that get three miles per Gallon of Premium gasoline will lecture us on "Conserving Energy" and "the Hot House Effect". This year especially they will celebrate the science fiction writings and movie of Al Gore and I will get madder.

The alternative lifestyle bunch who this year are running the show will tell us how downright evil we are for opposing "Gay Marriage" and a woman's right to kill her baby until it is weaned. They call their live in friends "Life Partners" not husband or wife but if we say marriage is between a Man and a woman ... Well, is there a word like "Heterophobe? That is what they are, Heterophobes!

The big guns will come out for the President and his war efforts to protect us from terrorists and the Islamic Fundamentalists who want to kill all of us for being "Infidels". I guess it is George W's fault that the Sunnis and Shiites aren't rational and that the Madrasa schools in Pakistan and Saudi Arabia teach that we are agents of Satan and Muslim boys can get thirty-nine virgins to play with if they commit suicide by blowing up our kids' school busses. Aren't we suppose to try to do something to protect our families? About this time I will excuse myself go out to buy beer!

I like Super Bowl Sunday a lot more than Academy Award Sunday anyway. Today is going to be hard on my marriage. Even if I watch, I won't be able to keep my mouth shut. If I say "Ellen Degenerate" even one time I know I am going to be in big trouble!

Mark Neckameyer
Irvine, CA

Received February 25, 2007 - Published February 27, 2006


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Ketchikan, Alaska