SitNews - Stories in the News - Ketchikan, Alaska



A letter to My Daughter's Birthmother
By John Wall


January 09, 2006
Monday PM

First let me say how sorry I am that you had to go through the unimaginable pain of being separated from your daughter. Although I'll never know the circumstances surrounding you placing her in an orphanage, it must have nearly crushed you. You are incredibly brave.

Alice Lei, that's the name we've given her, is a beautiful little girl. She's quick with a smile and a hug; there may be nothing better than feeling her little arms trying to reach around me with a squeeze.

We think of Alice not just in terms of my wife and me, but also of you. We know that our little girl is also your little girl.

Our daughter is perfect in every way. She's beautiful and smart. She loves to laugh. She eats everything in sight and gives us big open mouthed kisses with a delayed smooch.

I wish you could see how happy she is.

We talk of you often. Every morning, when she wakes, and every night when we put her down, we stop to say hello to China on the giant world map hanging in her room.

When I stop and watch Alice asleep in her crib, content sucking her thumb, safe and warm, I think about you. I often wonder what you look like-- mostly when I try to imagine what Alice will look like when she's grown.

I know it's unlikely, but I can't help but wonder if we might have seen you when we were traveling in China. A couple of days after we met Alice, we took a two hour drive to her orphanage and went out to lunch in Alice's hometown I wonder if you were one of the young women who watched us drive by. Most people we met were full of smiles, but it was easy to tell that the sight of these babies on their way to America made some sad.

I wanted to jump out of our van and talk to people on the street to ask if someone might know our little girl's birthmother. Maybe they knew her family, a sister or a cousin.

Maybe they could pass along a message to you. To let you know that our little girl will always love you. That we will support her and respect her and teach her everything we can about China. That we'll teach her that a woman's life is every bit as important as a man's and how important it is to respect yourself.

Maybe they could also pass along our thanks to you. It may seem selfish for us to say thank you, but you made the ultimate sacrifice and we couldn't imagine our lives if you hadn't. You gave up everything when you gave up your daughter for adoption. You gave up a lifetime of hugs and smiles the very least we can do is say thank you. Thank you for our little girl.

John Wall
Cincinnati, OH - USA


About: John Wall is an adoptive parent and the publisher of Internation Adoption Stories, a place to read and share adoption stories, agency advice, financing options, parenting tips and medical advice relating to adoption from countries like Russia, China, Guatemala and more.

Related News:

Chinese stonewall on baby smuggling By GEOFFREY YORK - Chinese officials have imposed a wall of silence on a baby-trafficking scandal in which orphanages and child-welfare agencies were implicated in a scheme to buy and sell at least 100 children. - More...
December 16, 2005

Smuggling of babies in China raises fears in the West By GREG MCARTHUR - Allegations of a baby-smuggling ring in China have shaken North American families, prompting them to question whether their children were legitimately obtained and whether they should continue to donate thousands of dollars to Chinese orphanages. - More...
December 18, 2005

Related Column:

Why children from our country aren't being adopted By BARBARA BOVA - For the past several years I've seen many acquaintances and friends adopting children from overseas. At first children were adopted from Europe, than the Baltic States, and now Asia and Africa. - More...
January 04, 2006


Note: Comments published on Viewpoints are the opinions of the writer
and do not necessarily reflect the opinions of Sitnews.


Write a Letter -------Read Letters

E-mail the Editor

Stories In The News
Ketchikan, Alaska